My opinion has changed completely over the past few weeks since the recent elections. I would like to apologize for being wrong and to ask forgiveness.
Bush should not have sent in troops without bipartisan and most importantly, worldwide support. The United States is a weakling and requires everyone's help to accomplish anything of importance. No strength of any kind can be found in the US - moral or otherwise. I was very misguided and stupid to have thought we could actually accomplish anything of substance in the Middle East. I had faith in us, our economy, our history, our strength, our values, our brainpower, our ingenuity, our technology and our courage. But I was grievously mistaken.
From this point on:
We should allow Europe to be in charge of world affairs, and we should construct a funnel of money, liberally supplied by our taxes (which should be raised). The funnel should be mounted upon a freely pivoting joint that can be turned and aimed in any direction. The Middle East will supply the oil to keep it well greased. Anytime anyone anywhere needs anything, we should turn it in that direction.
All US Presidents, political and government employees should have or quickly develop a crease between their brows. This should be utilized whenever they are asked any questions in order to imply great gravity of thought. They should also nod their heads. A lot. Unless the subject is controversial to anyone of another culture. In this case, they should shake their heads vigorously and say, "I'm sorry, we must ask the UN's opinion on that."
The UN should determine our foreign policy. We should have a seat at the table and a BIG IMPORTANT WEIGHTED vote, but we should only be permitted to use the vote as voted by the rest of the UN members.
At UN meetings, all US delegates should be required to raise their hand and ask before going to the bathroom. A lifesize cardboard cut-out of the current president should be kept in the lobby of the UN, with its back facing those who arrive. Everyone should be given a chance to stab it with a knife before entering the building.
The US should be required to send nuclear technology and technicians and materials at no cost to whoever wants them. The CIA should be disbanded. US borders should remain open to anyone and everyone. The President should sign a pledge that US culture, however, will remain strictly within the borders of the US. Other languages and cultures should be taught in our schools by nationals from those countries. Whenever US history is taught, a list of everything we've done wrong (to be put together by a special UN delegation) must also be taught at the same time.
Whenever a person from another country enters the room, Americans should rise and bow deeply, with both hands together in a prayer position in front of their faces. However, Americans must not be religious people, but confirmed, card-carrying atheists.
Finally, every American visiting a foreign country should be required to leave very large tips in restaurants, and to wear signs on their backs saying, "KICK ME."
We made a grave mistake going into Iraq. It was not our business. We were much too big for our britches. We should have known up front that we were incapable.
Americans, learn how to grovel humbly before all. Get used to others being in charge of your fate.
Maybe (oh please, oh please, oh please, oh please) they will leave us alone to watch American Idol and read about Brit and Fed-ex in peace...
If- - we play our cards right.
If - - we don't make them mad.
If - - we do what they say.

Honestly - - if I'd known that we didn't have what it took to topple Saddam and also establish a peaceful Iraq up front, I'd have said, "Don't do it."
We lack will, courage and determination and have no business being involved in world events.
A half-assed attempt leading to a huge failure. Shameful.
We could still prevail. We could pour in more troops. We could enforce the peace.
But I don't believe it's going to happen. I think we're going to repeat Vietnam and leave in disgrace.
On that day, I will be ashamed to call myself an American.
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